


progress

by minjiyoo



Category: Dreamcatcher (Korea Band)
Genre: Crushing, F/F, Office crush, Pining, RIP, a bit of angst, friends - Freeform, idk - Freeform, just writing without direction, stray fic rip, what is plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:42:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27624901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minjiyoo/pseuds/minjiyoo
Summary: "People really have an interesting stereotype for girls from a religious school, huh?""No," Siyeon's eyes widen. "I didn't mean to-"Bora laughs louder this time, head thrown back. "No. I'm not religious at all." Bora says, emphasizing the last words. "And yes, I do swing that way."
Relationships: Kim Bora | SuA/Lee Siyeon
Comments: 33
Kudos: 263





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this fic will be very messy. there will be constant editing here and there. there are no plots in mind AT ALL. idek why i wrote this lmao so i wrote this just for the sake of writing sjsjsj but i exerted effort on this and i may have killed a few brain cells (about to run out of it) so feedbacks will still be appreciated ㅠㅠ and obviously, it's chaptered DKSKSK yes, fighting to me lmao ENJOY!!!!

"Ask her out!" Minji pushes Siyeon that her pelvis hit the table from where she hides (behind her cubicle).

"No!" She hisses out. "Never."

Minji always teases her for being hopelessly in love (although she's insistent in saying that she's not) with the short woman from the editorial department named _Bora_. The girl is barely visible from Siyeon's workspace in the accounting department so making sure to have at least a brief glance of the pretty girl takes so much effort and a lot of bumping on her stall from Minji's violent tendencies.

"God. Fuck. You're a coward." Minji says who is, unlike her, very open in staring at the pretty short woman from the other department. _It's just Bora._ Siyeon just loves to call her pretty and short.

"Bitch." She retorts back. "You're not one to talk when Yoohyeon was literally the one who ended your years of delusional unrequited love and asked you out on a date."  


Minji shuts up and glares at her even though it looks more like she's cutely frowning. "Mine was different! We were friends." Her hands flail around to emphasize her point. "Bora doesn't even know you. If she rejects you, then forget her. Pretend she never existed."

She makes a face of disapproval. "That's easier said than done."

"And here you are saying you just have a crush on her."

Siyeon rolls her eyes before dismissing Minji with a forceful push so she can get back to work. Her job mocking her for even thinking about a girl that, in Minji's words, doesn't even know her.

  
\---

  
_**12:00 AM - Wednesday**_

Siyeon watches the hands of the clock move as she sits idly on her chair. It's way past office hours and honestly, she wants nothing but to go home and take a warm bath and fall asleep at the comfort of her Captain America pillows but the piles of paper on her desk seem to remind her about several sleeping schedules she will end up ruining. She feels drained. Minji and Yoohyeon offered to give her help but she politely declines. They both need to get their well-deserved rests as well. She smiles at the thought of her _dumb_ friends. She's thankful to have people to rely on when she feels like shit and to have people who will patiently remind her that it's alright to be vulnerable sometimes. She often denies being sad (believes she doesn't have the right to complain about being lonely or exhausted) and it is something she's working on about herself.

She lets out a sigh, feeling how painful her neck has become. She pushes herself off her seat, deciding to _call it a day_. A few more (hundreds) of papers to sort and she's good for the week. Hopefully. She can already feel the throbbing in her head and her back hurts as hell. She picks up her things, stuffing them inside her bag without care. The office is almost completely dimmed if not for the light from her computer and she doesn't want to give the cleaning facilities the chance to nag her again for staying late at work.

It takes her minutes to actually be able to find her car in the parking lot (Yoohyeon has the habit of borrowing it because Minji won't let her drive on her own and she always parks it somewhere Siyeon takes forever to find). She's huffing when she finds her it and she can see how awkwardly it's park. A little too close to the right and if by some stupid chance that the driver from the car next to her decides to drastically open their door, her car will be in a terrible (more on her bank account) pain. She quickly tosses her stuff in the back seat and just as she turns for the driver's seat, she catches a glimpse of someone sitting at the pavement not far away. She has to squint to get a clearer view (feeling dumb for not wearing her glasses when she's clearly blind). She chooses to ignore. After all, it's not her business if some girl suddenly decided to _car-gaze_ .

  
She starts her car, checking the side mirrors briefly before turning the radio on. She turns left and the terrible parkin of her car hits her even more when she has to make sure she won't hit the car beside her (this is why Minji doesn't allow Yoohyeon to drive). Just as she hits the accelerator, a figure jumps on the driveway and she curses out loud before stomping on the break (she nearly missed it). Her head heats up. She can feel her heart beating against her chest and it takes her a minute to calm down. She looks up and she barely sees the person in front of her car with the headlights flaring in angry yellow. It doesn't help (again) that she's nearly blind.

She goes out, slightly annoyed but more worried. "Are you o--"

"Siyeon, can you take me home?"

Siyeon stands still. She tries to process what she heard once and then twice. She blinks. She moves back and then forward. 

"How'd you-- No. I mean, why are you still here?"

 _Bora_ frowns and Siyeon mentally winces. She has to let the fact sink in that Bora is standing in flesh before her and that, by some miracle, she knows her. _Bora knows Siyeon._ Her brain panics and only then does she realize Bora trying to weigh a box full of papers with her tiny arms. Siyeon quickly comes to her aid and the shorter girl shyly mutters a _thank you_ and she follows Siyeon as she ushers her to the car.

Siyeon breathes in then out before hopping back to the driver's seat, mindful enough to ask the other woman if she needs anything which Bora politely answers with a gentle shake of head. Siyeon has a spacious car for her own good but the space feels tinier with Bora sitting on her passenger's seat.

"I'm sorry for troubling you." Bora refuses to look at her and Siyeon feels a slight pang of disappointment. Not that she expected the other girl to ogle at her when that feels even worse. "My friend was supposed to pick me up, but she was caught in some personal stuff and I left my car for repair."

Siyeon nods, not knowing how to respond. She drums her fingers on the steering wheel and licks her lips anxiously. "I... I'm..." She sighs and she doesn't bother to hide the exasperation in it. She doesn't notice Bora furrowing her brows, sadly. "Will you be able to tell me the address?"

Bora seems to wake up from her trance and she stutters to provide her address which is in the opposite direction as Siyeon's. Siyeon doesn't mind one bit. She maneuvers her car out on the street, and she prays hard that Bora can't sense how nervous she is. There are questions in her head, ones she badly wants to ask out loud, but she doesn't need to make the latter feel even more uncomfortable than she already is.

The music envelopes the space as silence ensues between the two of them and Siyeon can't help but wonder if Bora likes her taste in music because Minji and Yoohyeon don't.

"Yoohyeon wasn't kidding when she told me you like rock, huh?" Bora says suddenly and Siyeon struggles to slow down the car at the red light. The car stops just before she hits the one in front and she curses loudly out of instinct. She sees Bora grabbing her seatbelt.

Bora shifts on her seat, startled and so does Siyeon. They sit still for minutes until Siyeon remembers the question hanging in the air. She breathes deeply.

"I'm... well... yeah?" Siyeon is confused for a bit and she tries to gather her wits. "She talked to you about me?" She asks even before her mind can process the question and she fight hard the low groan. She forgets that Bora and Yoohyeon are from the same department.

Bora smiles although still not facing Siyeon. Siyeon can see that she's tired. Beautiful as always but the marks under her eyes are darker. Not that she's admitting that she stared at her for so many times that she can notice the difference. "Yeah. She loves telling stories. And I asked of you." She turns to look at Siyeon after saying that and Siyeon visibly twitches on her seat.

Siyeon opens her mouth to talk until the realization hits her. "Did she say anything else?" She doesn't mind if panic is written all over her face.

Bora stares at her with one brow raised. "Like what?"

The light goes green and Siyeon misses it if not for the cars honking from behind. She curses under her breath this time.

Bora waits for her to answer for a moment and then minutes pass by without an answer from her. She honestly forces herself to speak but she's busy dwelling with her thoughts that Bora turns to open the window instead, leaning against it to look outside. Siyeon feels guilty. She can hear Minji's voice in her head, nagging her about being dumb for not taking this chance. She really wants to but her phone rings, announcing their arrival at Bora's place. A tall apartment building. Bora mentions residing on the 10th floor. 

"Thank you so much, Siyeon." Bora says as she takes the box from the taller girl. Siyeon just smiles. Her eyes are not trying to meet Bora's because they make her feel butterflies in her chest. "I will make it up to you."

Siyeon wants to say she doesn't have to. She wants to say a small good-bye but instead of doing that, she nods and turns around to her car and from her side mirror, she sees Bora standing still as she drives away.

\---

"What?! She asked about you, so I answered her!" Yoohyeon tries to shield herself from Siyeon's attack. She hides behind Minji and Minji just stands there, willingly letting her girlfriend drag her around. "I didn't tell her that you like her, okay?" Yoohyeon yells. 

Siyeon kicks Yoohyeon in the shins, looking around cautiously to make sure nobody hears her and Yoohyeon just grins at her. She can't even be mad when she's acting cute like that. It's unfair.

"At least, it's confirmed that she knows you." Minji adds, finally having the chance to sit beside Siyeon and Yoohyeon follows her like a moth and she sits on her lap just after she gives Siyeon a thumbs up while wiggling her brows. 

"And I left a terrible impression!" She whines. "She probably thinks I'm rude."

Minji rolls her eyes at her. "She probably thinks you're shy, but I don't think someone would jump at the conclusion of you being rude after you drove them home?"

"Exactly!" Yoohyeon yells yet again and Minji shakes her head but she presses a kiss on Yoohyeon's shoulder and Yoohyeon giggles. Siyeon fakes a gagging sound and Yoohyeon laughs at her. "Dramatic as always."

Siyeon refuses to see them eye-fucking so she looks away. Her gaze lands to the department across their own and she sees Bora fixing something on her table, a cute frown on her face. She can't help but smile. There's a slight bitterness in her chest at the fact that she'll never be more than this. Someone who admires Bora from afar, along with the others. She sighs, continuing to stare for some more. Bora seems to stop for a while, and she looks up. Their eyes meet and Siyeon internally freaks out, but it soon fades as Bora gives her a wave and the frown Bora was wearing turns into an ear-to-ear smile.

\---

Even after that, Siyeon refuses to make a move because one, she has no idea if Bora swings that way (sure, Yoohyeon told her she _might_ be but that is not enough assurance) and two, if Bora does swing that way, she doubts she'll ever stand a chance. So, Siyeon either glances from a distance or the two of them exchange a shy wave whenever Bora catches her looking. It doesn't fail in making her heart beats so crazily that she feels it in her throat every time. 

She places the last of her hundreds of papers in her box and she sees 10 PM glaring at her in red from the digital clock on her table. She was able to finish her work early this time and relief washes through her. She hurries to get to her car, doing the same thing of tossing her stuff on the back seat and she runs to the driver's seat until she notices a figure running to her from the elevator. 

"Siyeon!" Bora's voice echoes in the air and Siyeon stands there, stunned.

She closes the door to her car and reaches out to help Bora with the box she's carrying. "Hey," Is all she could say. 

"Hey." Bora beams at her. "Can I..." Bora tries to look away, a soft shade of pink tinting her cheeks and Siyeon thinks it's because she ran but she'd like to hope that it's because she makes Bora nervous just as much as the presence of Bora makes her squirm. "Can I take a free ride again?"

Siyeon chuckles and Bora's blush deepens. "Car still in repair?" She walks Bora to the car and Bora follows her in tiny steps which Siyeon finds adorable (like the rest of things Bora does).

"Unfortunately." Bora quickly hops in the passenger's seat after Siyeon opens the door for her. Siyeon quickly runs for the driver's seat. 

"Were you waiting long?" Siyeon asks her before adjusting the temperature of the AC and turning the radio on.

"Not really. I was working for some papers and I saw you walking out so I ran after you."

Siyeon blinks. "You were upstairs too?"

Bora nods. "Yeah. I was just shy to approach you." Her voice has gotten tinier and she sinks on her seat.

Siyeon shrugs and she turns to check the side mirror to hide the smile threatening to paint her lips. Soon enough, they are already driving along the still busy streets of Seoul. The conversation is lighter this time. Siyeon feels like throwing up still but it's more bearable. She finds out Bora teaches dance on weekends and that is more like her profession than the office one however, with it, money does not come as often as necessary for Bora to be able to support herself, so she takes the corporate route which is not as bad as she assumed. Bora was from a middle-class family and she graduated from a prestigious _"all girls”_ Christian school.

"Oh," Siyeon hums, allowing herself to take a hold of the last information. "that's... interesting."

The car stops on a red light just in time with Bora letting out a soft laugh. Siyeon looks at her with curiosity and Bora returns the gaze although with playfulness. "People really have an interesting stereotype for girls from a religious school, huh?"

"No," Siyeon's eyes widen. "I didn't mean to-"

Bora laughs louder this time, head thrown back. "No. I'm not religious at all." Bora says, emphasizing the last words. "And yes, I do swing that way."

Siyeon nearly punches the wheels in shock. She chokes and Bora stares at her as she coughs her lungs out. She can feel heat creeping up from her neck to the tips of her ears and she whines, not exactly knowing why. She glances at Bora and the latter eyes her with a bit of concern and a lot of mischief. She opens her mouth to speak but she only shrieks on her seat and Bora laughs at her even louder. The light goes green and Bora doesn't say anything else (much to Siyeon's surprise), but her smile stays until they arrive at their destination.

Siyeon doesn't move as Bora undoes her seat belt. She shuts her eyes close and then breathes in deeply. She figures, with all this indication, she might as will give it a push (or not). She doesn't know what to do. Bora opens the door to hop out but Siyeon reaches out for her, her fingers wrap around Bora's tiny wrist. "Bora," 

Bora looks back at her and then to her hand their joined hands, and she almost let go but Bora sits back properly and untangles Siyeon's hand to properly hold it in her own. Tiny hands barely covering her fingers. Bora's features scream tiny. "Yes?"

"I..." Siyeon wants to scream, feeling overwhelmed by this entire situation. Bora runs her thumb at the back of her hand, and she can feel tears pooling at the corner of her eyes. _Yoohyeon was right about her being dramatic_. "... I just want to ask if you..." She breathes shakily and Bora looks at her, encouraging her to continue. ".... if you still need a driver later?" She tries to sound funny and it seems to work because Bora chuckles.

"Is it safe to assume that you don't feel bothered by it?" Bora asks genuinely.

Siyeon blurts out a _no_ and she pull her hand to a cross causing Bora to be pulled closer as well to her. Bora leans a hand on the gear shift to support herself and her head bumps on Siyeon's chest. Siyeon lets out a yelp, her free hand grabbing Bora by her top to stop her from falling flat on Siyeon's lap. "Oh my god. I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

Bora grunts and Siyeon readies another batch of apology until Bora looks up to her just when she looks down. Now, Siyeon had imagined seeing Bora in different situations but none of it involves this proximity. The only image that she has of Bora is with her watching from afar and to have the woman leaning on her, the shorter's girl breathing on her, makes her feel delirious.

Bora stays still (sore arm and Siyeon grabbing her top too tight aside) and her eyes shift from Siyeon's face then to her lips. "What were you saying?" Her voice sounds hush and Siyeon swallows the lump in her throat.

"I..." She shifts on her seat. “…I like taking you home.”

“Yeah?” Bora says before pushing herself up. She sits up then looks straight ahead and it looks like she's thinking. Even in the dark, Siyeon can see how red her face is and she’s sure she’s not any better

The silence is too much, unbearable and Siyeon starts to overthink. “I’m-“ She wants to apologize once more but Bora cuts her off.

Bora leans forward once and Siyeon freezes when she kisses her cheek. “You’re my personal driver from now on.” And she giggles. _She giggles while Siyeon feels like fainting_.

Bora hops out of the car with a tiny wave, refusing to have Siyeon help her (a cute glare and all) and this time, Siyeon waits for her to actually get inside the building before driving away. She checks the side mirror for nothing in particular, refusing to hear how loud her heart is thumping that she can feel it in her head. She bites her bottom lip, running a hand on her hair. 

When she checks the time, it’s almost midnight and yet, she feels no remorse. Her lips are stretched in a smile she didn’t even know she’s wearing until her cheeks hurt. 

She touches the spot where Bora kissed her and she mumbles a chant in her head.

“A progress.” She repeats it louder. “A progress!” And she shouts. “A fucking progress.”

She ignores the honking behind her after a missed green light. She tips the toll-gate lady and she messages Minji and Yoohyeon telling them she loves them in a form of an essay she doubts they will read.

Indeed. A _progress_.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> she comes to think that, maybe, the perfect timing isn’t so far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the reaction to the first chapter motivated me to quickly write the second part sjsjsj and nothing has changed, its still a no-direction fic and idk what to feel about that fact lmao i hope you enjoy this as well. i enjoy writing this and that's good right? huhu feedbacks will be highly appreciated.

Siyeon wakes up in a good mood. She cooks breakfast and packs some for Minji and Yoohyeon (and maybe a bit more for Bora). She even takes some of Minji’s works as if the pile of papers on her desk is not enough.

Minji eyes her weirdly as she bounces on her feet to her workspace. A few interns walking past her and Siyeon greets them enthusiastically. She even hands a cup of coffee to Minji (which the latter takes with furrowed brows). She takes her time placing her stuff on her table as Minji waits for her patiently. 

“What happened?” Minji asks, arms crossed on her chest. Siyeon blinks, feigning innocence and Minji rolls her eyes, not having any of it. “With you and Bora.”

Siyeon fights the need to grin. “Nothing.”

And there’s no way Minji will believe that. Especially not when Bora enters the floor with a smile so bright. The girl roams her eyes around, looking for something, until she sees Siyeon. Bora waves cutely, tapping her wrist watch and motioning an “ _ok_ ” sign. Siyeon returns it with a blush and Minji looks at them in confusion. Bora beams before hopping to her own space, the crown of her head barely visible when she sits.

“Okay. For real, Siyeon. What happened?”

“It’s really nothing. I just drove her home and she agreed when I asked if she wants me to take her home today too and the days after that and she—” Siyeon pauses, taking a deep breathe and contemplates whether to share the last information or not.

“And she?”

Siyeon looks away, eyes shifting to anywhere but Minji. “That’s all.”

Minji sits back, unconvinced.

“I’m telling the truth!” Siyeon announces and Minji doesn’t say anything. “Seriously.” Siyeon adds and the more she speaks, the deeper Minji’s frown gets. “Okay, fine! She kissed me here.” Siyeon exhales, pointing her cheek with a pout.

Minji stands. “She kissed you?” She jumps and Siyeon holds her ground when she nearly pushes her off her seat. “Did you confess?” Minji eyes twinkle as she forces Siyeon to face her, hands on Siyeon’s shoulder, gripping a bit too tight. Siyeon makes a face.

“I didn’t.”

Minji lets her go just as fast as she punches her on the arm. “Ah so dumb.”

“Yahhh!” Siyeon protests, aiding her pained arm. “I told you it’s not that easy.”

“She managed to kiss you! You’re just gonna ask her out. That’s easy! But instead of doing that, you asked to be her driver?” Minji’s voice is getting louder with every words she’s letting out and Siyeon struggles to keep her down.

“Unnie, you are making a scene.” Siyeon looks around and sees a few people looking at them.

Minji notices the stares and shyly mumbles an apology before taking her seat. “You are wasting your chance!”

“I’m not!” Siyeon answers although she is not so sure about that herself. “I’m just finding the right time.”

“Oh wow.” Minji teases. “From never to I’m finding the right timing. You really had it bad, huh.”

“Oh shut up.” Siyeon pushes Minji away when she tickles her side. She only stops when Yoohyeon walks to them with heart eyes, placing a kiss on Minji’s crown before Minji proceeds on sharing the details of Siyeon’s night. It still feels surreal. It’s too good to be true, in fact but when she takes a peek on the department just at the far end of the floor, Bora’s tiny head pops up from her own cubicle. Siyeon’s eyes widen at being caught but Bora only gives her a wave and they shyly beam at each other.

Maybe, Siyeon can find the perfect timing soon.

\----

  
Siyeon stands before the photocopy machine like it’s something she hasn’t seen before. There are buttons that need to be pressed and honestly, Siyeon doesn’t know how to. She tries to press one button and the machine singsongs, startling her. She waits for it to eject the paper she needs several copies of but the light just dims and the machine turns off. Siyeon sighs in annoyance.

“Siyeon?” Siyeon jumps and her papers nearly flew if not for the tiny hands that immediately held it on place. “Hey. Hey. It’s just me.”

Siyeon turns around to an amused Bora. “Oh god. You scared me.”

Bora laughs before placing the papers she’s carrying on the shelf nearby. “You’re too focused on what you’re doing that you didn’t notice me coming in. Were you photo-copying?” Bora asks, looking at the papers laying down on top of the machine. 

Siyeon nods.

“The machine is turned off though.” Bora examines the machine to confirm her assumption and she looks back to Siyeon who quickly looks away, scratching the back of her neck as her face reddens. “You don’t know how to use the machine, do you?”

Siyeon raises her hands in defense. “I do. It’s just that-”

“Turn it on then.” Bora urges her and Siyeon blinks at her. Bora smiles teasingly and Siyeon’s blush deepens as she whines.

“Okay, fine.” Siyeon huffs. “I don’t know how to use it. Minji does this all the time.”

Bora tries to hold her grin but Siyeon pouts and she can’t help but find it adorable so she lets out a soft chuckle instead, nudging Siyeon’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I got you.” Bora holds her wrist to pull her closer and Siyeon smells the jasmine scented perfume Bora is wearing. “I’ll teach you how.”

Siyeon doesn’t dare to move as Bora does her thing. Bora is a lot smaller than her. She can literally see the top of her head even when she stands straight. Her hair looks raven black from afar but this close, it’s dark red. Her nose is so high that Siyeon fights the urge to run her finger on it. She has a mole under her left eye. Her lips are so red, she can even smell cherry. 

“You’re supposed to watch me do this and not stare on my face, Siyeon.” Bora suddenly talks and all Siyeon can see is her lashes fluttering from where she stands yet she can hear the smirk in her voice. “Yoohyeon did say you find me very pretty so I guess that’s true?” She adds as she presses one button and the machine starts to work. 

Before Siyeon can even process what she’s asked, Bora looks up to her and their face nearly touched. Siyeon shakes and Bora holds her in place, the hand on her wrist never once letting go. She stumbles back in an attempt to give space between them but Bora just inches forward.

Siyeon is internally panicking. Bora is too close that she thinks that Bora can hear how loud her thoughts are, but before Siyeon can even gather the words in her head to answer coherently, “Do you want to have dinner with me?” is what she blurts out.

“Oh.” Bora finally lets her go and she visibly shrinks on her own as she catches her breathe. “Dinner?”

Siyeon mentally scolds herself. She refuses to look at Bora and the way her eyes are probably tracing the way her face turns as red as tomato. “Y-yeah…”

Bora smiles and Siyeon can’t confirm whether she saw her cheeks get tinted by a soft shade of pink. Bora goes back to the papers, sorting them out properly and placing them on the box Siyeon brought with her. Siyeon watches her, nervous. She expects to be rejected but to think that it’s actually going to happen leaves a jabbing pain in her chest.

“Is it a date, though?”

The time stops on Siyeon’s end. “Huh?”

“Is it a dinner date?” Bora asks again, carrying the box and handing it to Siyeon carefully. She doesn’t move back even after Siyeon got a hold of the box. She waits for the answer while leaning so close to Siyeon and if Siyeon doesn’t know too well, she’d think Bora enjoys seeing her panic.

“If you want it to be.” She stutters through the words and Bora looks her in the eye then her gaze drops on her lips. Siyeon sees her swallow.

And Siyeon really thinks she’s about to kiss her. Bora leans forward and Siyeon’s breathing hitches. She feels soft lips pressed on the side of her own and she feels combusting from then and there. “Okay, then.”

Siyeon takes time to properly react and by the time the words sink in, Bora has already pushed her out of the photocopy room looking lost. 

“Fuck.” She mumbles to herself.

\---

"Fuck me!"

Siyeon lets out a loud groan. Her forehead meets the marbled countertop with a painful thud. Her kitchen looks crazily unfamiliar after she has had the bravery of cooking a fancy decent dinner. It was a failure if the mess in her kitchen were to speak. She whines in frustration. She takes a quick look at the clock sitting atop her door frame and she suddenly wants to cry. Exactly an hour before Bora arrives for the dinner date Siyeon had invited her to. Siyeon wants to punch herself. She was so confident about getting this done that she blatantly ignored the fact that she has no talent, at all, in anything that involves the kitchen (other than eating, of course).  
  
She removes the wolf-printed apron she's wearing in an attempt to look domestic. She groans, embarrassed by her own childish quirks. She takes time to process her thoughts. She had specifically told Bora to not eat before getting to her place. So much for impressing a crush, to be very honest. 

In desperation to have something served on her table for the older girl, she takes a quick look at the stickers attached on her fridge's door for instances that her skills won't allow her to eat a personally cooked food (which is pretty often than not) and she hoped Bora loved pizza just as much as she does.

\---

Bora drives herself to Siyeon’s place. She scans the place briefly before Siyeon ushers her to sit in the living room. Siyeon is wearing a knitted sweater and a pale blue jeans. Her hair is tied on a bun and she’s wearing wolf slippers. Siyeon is certain that she looks constipated. She’s so nervous that her palms are sweating. 

  
“So? We have a bad news.” She starts once Bora settles on her sofa, removing her blazer which Siyeon quickly takes. 

  
Bora only hums and Siyeon stops for a while to appreciate how beautiful Bora looks in her pink sweater and denim shorts. She’s wearing high socks and white pair of shoes. Her hair let loose on her shoulder. Siyeon always thinks she’s gorgeous but it’s her first time to see the shorter girl’s in casual attires and she can’t help but be awed by it.

  
“Stop staring.” Bora whines and instead of panicking, Siyeon smiles at her until the problem comes back in front of her brain.

  
Instead of actually telling Bora the problem, she runs to her kitchen to bring the boxes of pizza before dropping them on the center table.

  
Bora looks at her weirdly. “What’s this? I mean, I know it’s pizza but I thought you’ll cook?”

  
Siyeon bites her lip at the memories of her trying to come up with a decent dish. Bora just stares at her, trying to gauge her reaction and it doesn’t take her long to realize the situation. “You don’t know how to cook?”

  
And Siyeon thinks Bora is genuinely disappointed by that fact and her shoulder drops. She tries to salvage the situation by trying to run to the kitchen to order actual food but before she can even do so, Bora calls for her.

  
“Siyeon, sit here.” Bora taps the space beside her and she laughs at how tiny Siyeon moves closer to her. Once the taller girl is near, Bora pulls her down on the sofa.

  
Siyeon expects her to rant, to tell her how disappointed she is. She proudly offers to prepare something for them yet all Bora gets are boxes of pizza she has no idea if Bora likes. Bora sighs before cupping her face with both hands. 

“Can you stop being awkward with me?” The words come out more as a plea than a question. Siyeon looks down, not having the strength to keep the eye contact. “I agreed to come here even before you offered to cook and I’m still here even after you announced you haven’t done any cooking.” Bora laughs and she does too. “I’m here because of you and as long as you are happy to have me here too, I don’t mind eating instant noodles with you.”

  
Siyeon tears up and she tries to figure out if it’s because she feels bad about how her plan turned out or if it’s because she feels overwhelmed by the fact that this is actually happening. It’s crazy how things escalated to this without the need of her throwing up her guts, willing herself to confess and honestly, she has no idea if Bora and her are on the same page. If Bora knows Siyeon is head over heels for her or she’s just being overly friendly.

  
“Say something.” Bora demands, still cradling Siyeon’s face. 

  
“I’m happy to have you here.” Siyeon’s answers back and if by any chance someone tells her this is true, that everything is actually happening, she’ll refuse to believe them. 

  
Bora laughs, an airy one, as though her relief comes along with it. Siyeon places her hands atop one of Bora’s and she leans in to the touch. “You’re so beautiful.” Bora exhales and that’s probably the only time Siyeon sees her looking lost. Bora’s gaze drowns in the darkness of her pupils.

  
Siyeon badly wants to kiss her but fear kicks her in the gut and it shows with the way her eyes shift from Bora’s eyes to her lips.

  
She knows Bora has the same thought. She feels her leaning in. She has gotten as close as Siyeon being able to count her eyelashes. She shuts her eyes close, waiting for it to happen. She knows it nearly happened but before their lips could ever touch, the oven beeps so loudly. Siyeon sits still until it dawns on her that she actually left pizzas in the oven for reheating.

  
She jumps from her seat, nearly tripping on her own feet until she hears a pop. She stands on the middle of the living room and kitchen before looking back to Bora who is as shocked as she is. She groans. “Fuck.”

Bora laughs so loud that Siyeon can hear her even after she runs to the bathroom for a wet towel. Bora laughs with her as she cleans the oven. Bora laughs at her as she helps her fix the mess that is called her counter top. Bora laughs at her when she crams to order another box of pizza because apparently, all orders she had made were of cheese flavors and Bora hates it. 

  
As the night gets deeper, Bora buries herself deeper on Siyeon’s side. She kisses her cheek and Siyeon smiles at her before placing a kiss at the side of her head.

  
Bora laughs again and again about every dumb story Siyeon tells her. Siyeon watches as Bora cries in laughter about a story of Siyeon running after a car she believes to be her own until she checks the plate number. Siyeon has a genuine grin on her face.

She can still feel the butterflies wildly growing inside her and her heart beat never once calmed down. Bora takes another slice of pizza and bites it before urging her to take a bite of her own. She does and Bora kisses her cheeks after. She chases after her and plants a kiss on Bora's cheek too and Bora shrieks. The pizza flies in the air landing on her sofa, top first. Bora falls on her back and her head hits the counter table. Siyeon hurries to assist her but Bora ends up pulling her down on the floor. 

Bora's voice echoes around her flat and she can't help but yell with her. When Bora throws an arm around her waist and buries her face on the crook of her neck, Siyeon holds her close.

  
And she comes to think that, maybe, the perfect timing isn’t so far.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm minjiyoo on twitter <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> she is dumb. minji is right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i will end this at 4th chapter and i liked writing this part and tbh what is a nice relationship without drama. i hate myself for this dw

Minji keeps asking her if Bora and her are already together and Siyeon only shakes her head everytime. Yes, Bora basically stays most of the time at her place, either watching a movie or cooking or just lazing around as Siyeon does her work (Bora scolds her for doing work at home but if she doesn’t, she’d end up jobless) and that doesn't mean they are together, right?

Bora sits beside her as she finishes a paper explaining the company’s record for the month. A few more details and she’s all set but Bora, as impatient as she is, starts reaching out for her hand, kissing it and biting her fingers. She refuses to let her go even when Siyeon asks her to and Siyeon knows she’s not going to stop until she gets what she wants.

Siyeon lets out a sigh, saving whatever document it is she is editing and closing her laptop before allowing Bora to fit herself in the gap between her and the counter table as she straddles her. Bora kisses her forehead before melting into her embrace. It’s crazy to think that they keep having this proximity but they haven’t kissed yet. None of them wants to open the conversation about it and weirdly, it's fine for Siyeon.

Siyeon holds Bora close, making sure she won’t fall and hit her head again (which is already a running joke between the two of them). Siyeon checks the messages on her phone and she hears Bora mumbling on the crook of her neck.

“Hmm?”

“I have a small favor to ask.” Bora says and it takes Siyeon’s attention so she listens.

\---

When Bora asks her to be her date on a birthday party the older girl must attend, she expects it to be just the casual hang out between friends in their animal print pajamas and bare faces. Bora however asked her to dress nicely (with a side note of 'you always dress well but do extra this time' with a peck on her cheek). Siyeon did just that and by the time she arrives at Bora's place, she already feels her feet aching. She did her hair, put on a make-up, and wore heels to match her body tight ocean blue knee length one-piece dress. She had to bribe Minji with a one-week free lunch because she called off from work. 

All because she has a crush on someone named Bora and she aims to impress her.

  
She shakes her head in disbelief. She can't help but smile as she checks herself on the mirror one more time before messaging Bora to let her know that she has arrived. Bora replies a quick _'okay, baby <3'_ and soon enough, she walks out of the building in a sleeveless silver cowl neck dress (hugging her curves in all the right places) barely reaching her knees. A tear shaped necklace laid on her chest. Her hair is pulled up in a high ponytail and her heels are as high as the slit at the side of her dress.

  
Siyeon curses under her breath and she swallows the lump in her throat as Bora hops into her car and sits on her passenger's seat after pressing a quick peck on the side of her lips.

It's as if Bora didn't notice the shock on her face because she turns around to place something at back seat before shuffling to wear her seat belt. "How are you doing?" Bora huffs before turning to look at her and if it's not comical enough, Bora shrinks into a coughing fit after seeing her, leaning one hand on the window to ground herself.

Siyeon panics for a bit until Bora laughs at the genuine concern on her face. "Are you okay?"

"I am." Bora says moments after. "Fuck. You look so good."

  
Siyeon blushes at the compliment, not only because she finds Bora cursing hot but mostly because the compliment came from someone as gorgeous as her. She gently pushes the older girl on the shoulder and she exaggeratedly fake a pained expression. Siyeon can only shake her head.

  
Bora holds her free hand as she starts the car and she kisses the back of her hand, wiping the lipstick stain left on it right after before cutely beaming at her.

  
“Whose birthday are we attending again?" She asks minutes after.

  
"Handong." Bora says without looking at her from her phone.

  
"A friend?" Siyeon asks again as they stop on a red light.

  
Bora eyes her briefly then looks straight ahead. "A friend of a friend."

  
Siyeon nods, not wanting to ask more as it seems like Bora doesn't like the topic or maybe because they are not obliged to share anything to each other. She fights the urge to say something when Bora lets go of her hand. She doesn't say anything at all when Bora chooses to ignore her for the rest of the ride, all for asking a name. The mood changed that quickly.

  
Suddenly, Siyeon feels a heavy weight on her shoulders for asking the name of someone she doesn't even know, and with the way Bora is acting, she's not sure how the night would actually end for them. 

  
\--

  
The party is already starting when they arrived. The place is all hyped up and Bora leaves her at the entrance to call someone. People coming in and out of the venue are all expensive looking from head to toe and she can't help but feel a bit out of place. She doesn't say anything even. when Bora returns and she has someone with her. The stranger introduces herself as Yubin. Bora's friend. The woman exchanges a polite hello to her and then they were ushered inside the venue. Siyeon tries to keep up with their fast steps, Bora pulling her with one hand.

  
When they stopped, it's on a table with two other people. One that is very pretty and young-looking girl named Gahyeon (Siyeon actually wonders how she was allowed inside when the party is bar themed) and the other is a very elegant, rich, and beautiful woman with the name Handong. 

  
Siyeon's eyes linger on Handong and the way she smiles as she reaches out for her hand when Bora introduces her as a date. She returns the gesture.

  
"A date, huh?" Handong asks Bora and the latter only rolls her eyes, taking one glass on the table in front of them and downing it in one go.

  
Everybody on the table looks tensed and Siyeon feels like she's witnessing something she's not supposed to. As if she's an intruder even when Bora clearly invited her. Yubin clears her throat before raising a toast for everyone else. Siyeon picks her own glass. She doesn't plan to get drunk, especially when she's driving home but weirdly, she feels like drinking all the liquors displayed in front of her. 

  
"What do you do for a living, Siyeon?" Handong asks. She's sitting beside Gahyeon and across Bora while Siyeon is sitting beside the latter. The question is pretty easy to answer but it feels like it carries something else in it. 

Siyeon blinks.

  
“I work in the same company Bora works in.” Siyeon is proud of her job. It isn’t easy to do what she’s doing, even more so for a company as big as the one she’s working in but of course, it was Handong who asked and by the looks of it and by how grand this party is, that doesn’t seem to impressive. She anxiously shifts on her seat.

“An office girl.” Handong smirks. No. She laughs. 

“Handong,” Gahyeon says, letting out a sigh. “Please.”

Siyeon is lost. Bora only places a hand on her thigh from under the table and she turns to her but Bora doesn’t say anything. She has a stoic expression ever since they arrived and Siyeon wonders, if Handong is a friend of her friend, aren’t they supposed to be in good terms, especially since they were basically invited here.

  
Handong looks her up and down before standing up and walking away. Only then does Siyeon realize that she’s holding her breath. She wets her lips. Yubin and Gahyeon’s apologies falling on deaf ears. 

  
Things happen so quickly that when she looks around, Bora is not beside her. Siyeon badly wants to go home. It makes her heart hurt that someone close to Bora doesn’t like her. It’s as if she’s being told to fuck off when she hasn’t even taken her steps yet. She feels terrible. And maybe Bora will understand that, right?

She bids bye to Gahyeon and Yubin and she tries to look for Bora. She checks the bathroom. She checks the dancefloor and even the bar but she doesn’t see her. She ends up walking at the part that extends the party up to the pool area. A few people are gathered here and there but not much to stop her from catching a glimpse of Bora’s figure. Her silver dress shining as the party lights hit it.

She isn’t alone and Siyeon seems to have walk in to a scene. Bora looks smaller with Handong towering over her. The girl’s arm wrapped around her waist while the other is on her nape, holding her in place. Siyeon doesn’t need to come close to know what they are doing.

And maybe she has had so much alcohol even when she’s perfectly aware that she just had one glass but she stays there, rooted. Her eyes meet Handong and the latter smirks at her. Siyeon swallows the knot in her throat. She steps back, hitting a table with so much force and sending its content on the floor in a shattering mess. She gathers everyone’s attention and she panics. She crams in picking up the broken pieces and she isn’t so sure if it’s just because her eyes are starting to get blurry from tears or she really feels wetness on her fingers and then pain. There’s pain but she isn’t sure where.

She hears someone screaming her name from somewhere and someone yelling a _"Let me go,"_ but Siyeon doesn't get the time to check who.

Before she knows it, a hand stops her from picking up another piece and she looks up, expecting it’s Bora (she really prayed it’s Bora) but it’s Yubin. “You’re bleeding.” 

“Am I?” The lack of emotion in her voice surprises her. “I didn’t know.” She knows she’s crying but her voice is so steady it amazes her.

“Siyeon,” Someone calling her name hasn’t hurt this much and soon enough, her tears pour down and it seems impossible to stop it. She tries to wipe it with her hands, her blood staining her face and she shakes realizing it. “Do you want to go home?” It’s a genuine question. It’s filled with concern as if everybody knows this will happen to her.

She nods. A group of people soon cleans the mess and before Yubin pulls her out of the scene, she sees Bora looking back at her with what seems like horror in her face. It even looks like she’s running after her but Handong pulls her back and Siyeon loses sight of them.

  
Siyeon feels so shitty. She can’t feel anything else but pain. Her hands are shaking as Yubin aids them. Gahyeon begs her to stop crying and she honestly wants to but her stupid eyes won’t let her.

  
“They are exes.” Yubin tells her as she wraps a bandage on her fingers after cleaning it. They are somewhere Yubin calls _safe_ maybe because she knows Siyeon needs space. “It’s not my story to tell but it already came to this.” Yubin adds. “I’m even surprised Bora brought you. She mentioned going on dates with someone but we didn’t think she’d introduce you to us this early.”

Siyeon shuts her eyes close, trying to process the information in her head. It seems like the information doesn’t matter anymore.

“She’s not a bad person but she’s worst with decisions and handling her emotions.” Yubin tries to defend Bora and she doesn’t know whether she should feel relived. “I genuinely think she likes you. Handong just loves pulling Bora every time she manages to get a grip of herself. Bora hates her.”

Siyeon chuckles but she keeps her mouth shut. _It doesn’t seem like it's the case, though._ She thinks. Yubin then helps her to walk towards her car even with her declining. Gahyeon gives her number and demands for her to text when she’s home. Siyeon can’t help but feel sad. If things went well with Bora and her, they could have been her friends.

"If she explains herself, please let her." Yubin pleads and Siyeon doesn't answer.

She gets into her car and she sits there not knowing exactly what to do. The night has started crazily. She can’t help but hate herself. She should have read between the lines. She holds her head in her hands and she tries to think what hurts more, the fact that she sees Bora kissing someone or the fact that Bora and her are probably not on the same page.

She is in love with someone in love with someone else (or not? honestly Siyeon is tired to even know).

She wants to shout. She wants to cry her heart out. She wants to get drunk until she forgets this night happened but all she manages to do is start her car and drive home because she promised Minji she’ll get to work early tomorrow but before that, Siyeon fishes for her phone and texts Gahyeon to give her Bora’s stuff. She even tells Gahyeon to make sure Bora gets home safe. Gahyeon smiles sadly at her.

She’s so dumb. Minji is right.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You know I don't want to see you, right?" 
> 
> "Yes." Bora answers. "I understand that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's it! i'm not satisfied but at least i was able to finish it :( this has been fun to write and i was not really aiming for anything long ass or deadly angsty or porn-like sexy SKDJSKJDKS i don't have the skills to deliver that. i appreciate all the supports i got for this even when this shit doesn't deserve it. i hope i can quickly write a new one to let my brain work properly bcs its rusty as hell :( feed backs will still be appreciated and you can freely point out the areas i need improvements with. thanks yall!!!! <3

Days pass by in a blur. Siyeon struggles to keep track of it especially after the company had given her the privilege to work at home with the help of Minji and Yoohyeon. She has no idea what bluff they told her manager but there she is, looking at the blinking digital clock on her bedside table telling her that it's almost midnight. 

Most times, she'll consider it too early but tonight, it feels like the time is dragging itself. She closes her laptop after saving some files and reaches out to the cup of coffee sitting on her right and briefly, she's taken back to those times Bora would leave a coffee on her table with sticky notes saying, _'do well, pretty', 'i'm cheering on you'_ and ' _to the_ _prettiest girl in the company'._

She shakes her head trying to clear it from thoughts about Bora and she often succeeds. She hasn't heard of the woman since forever (or she tries not to). Bora has been constantly flaring up her phone to the point she has to block her to keep her peace. She sometimes drives all the way to her place then sits outside her unit waiting for her to open the door, but she refuses to do so. She is not even sure how she's getting in. She knows she's being mean, but she just wants to deal with her thoughts first before facing her fear. It's funny to her still how losing Bora is a fear she has developed during the times they were together (or not).

She sighs, standing up to bring the empty cup to the kitchen. It's raining hard outside, and she walks up to the window to close the curtain. She turns off all the lights in the living room before going back to her bedroom to finally get her sleep. She shuffles under her blanket, reaching out for her phone to check messages. There are some from Minji and about two from Yoohyeon. Minji's messages are all about asking if she has eaten or if she needs help with something. Yoohyeon's messages are all about whether she has gotten the new playstation and if they could play together. She smiles. At least she has her friends to always make her feel that everything is real (even when she sometimes hopes it isn't).

  
  


\---

  
  


_She is shaking when she decides to stop driving. She fears what could happen to hear when she can basically see nothing with the tears refusing to stop falling. Her hands are still shaking, and her phone keeps ringing. Last thing she knows, she stops in front of Minji's porch. She wobbles as she walks to the door. The lights inside are already off and she silently prays Minji is still awake. She can't handle the night alone._

_"M-minji…" She calls out after three knocks. "Minji, please." She tries again and almost instantly the door opens hastily, revealing Minji looking so deshelved with Yoohyeon walking behind her wrapped with a blanket. Her hair looks just as messy._

_"Siyeon," Minji eyes her with shock and Siyeon feels bad for ruining what seems to be an intimate night for the couple. "What happened to you?" Minji asks as she pulls her inside. Yoohyeon seems to catch up with the situation and she quickly runs back to the bedroom to get dressed. She returns back and sits beside her on the couch. "Where's Bora?"_

_At the mention of the name, Siyeon seems to have lost control of herself and she cries louder. She cries so hard. She cries it all. Minji and Yoohyeon are patiently waiting for her to talk._

_That night, she sleeps in between the two. Minji throws an arm around her and Yoohyeon nuzzles on her shoulder and somehow, she feels a bit better._

  
  


_\---_

  
  


Siyeon breathes out then decides to call it a day, for real until she receives a notification in her instagram account that she barely uses this day. It's a direct message from someone anonymous. Usually, she won't bother checking it but the first words of the message as she sees it are, _"I know you had me blocked…"_ and honestly, she only has one person blocked and it's Bora. She chooses to ignore it until another message arrives. _"I won't leave here until you talk to me"_ is what it says and Siyeon doesn't care, to be honest. She knows Bora will end up going home anyways.

Who is dumb enough to stay outside with the rain pouring so hard? And it's not like the condominium personnel would let her in without an invitation from one of the residents. She furrows her brows and throws her phone on the space beside her. She shuts her eyes close and tries to sleep. She tries because that seems impossible with the fact Bora might be outside, in the rain. 

She groans. She stands up just to check if it's true. The rain seems to be pouring harder than a while ago. She goes to the window. She can barely see anything outside with how hard it is raining. She squints her eyes to try to look for any figure and sees none. She rolls her eyes, not believing Bora tricked her and she fell for it. She's about to close the curtain again until she looks at the pavement across their building. A woman sits there, hugging her knees as the rain pours on her. Siyeon's blood heats up.

Opening the window to get a better view, she does see Bora sitting there, shaking. "Fuck." She mumbles. "Bora!" She yells and the woman seems shaken, quickly looking around and then up. "What the fuck are you doing there?"

She knows she sounds harsh, but she can't help but feel anger rising in her with how Bora looks from where she is, 6th floors away. She hates how even after she's hurt by her, she can't stop feeling bad at how fucked up she looks. She's certain Bora is soaking. She's shaking and at the sight of Siyeon, Bora seems to have forgotten she's under the rain, she smiles so wide and waves. It is as if seeing Siyeon is enough.

Siyeon quickly runs for an umbrella and she nearly slip on the hallway as she presses the elevator open. Her heart is beating so loud that she can hear it in her head. She's not ready to see Bora. She doesn't even know if she'll ever be ready but she's sure that Bora being sick and harmed because of her are the last things she wants. Even after all that had happened.

She keeps running, desperate to get to Bora as fast as she could. The umbrella tumbles from her hold but she runs still. When she reaches Bora, she's as drenched. The shorter girl stands up, albeit shakingly. Her fingers are starting to prune, and her shoulders are trembling. Siyeon holds her close.

"What's wrong with you?" She starts and she really is mad. "Are you out of your mind?" She ushers Bora back to the building, her umbrella already forgotten.

Bora only hums and Siyeon hears her say something but she doesn't understand. She figures they can talk about it upstairs.

The elevator ride is so awkward. Bora stands in the middle as Siyeon presses herself at the far end of it. She sees how Bora's brows furrow at the gesture, but she doesn't say anything. When the elevator stops at her floor, she tries to think about what to tell the older girl. Should she make her stay? Warm her up and ask her to go? She has no idea.

She enters her unit in rush, Bora following behind her carefully (almost hesitant). Only then does Siyeon let the panic sink in. She stops in the middle of her living room not knowing exactly what to do. She's ruining her carpet at this point, but she can't seem to move.

Bora clears her throat. As if she's aware that her presence is unwanted. "I'm," She begins and Siyeon turns to look at her as she stands right at the doorstep, not attempting to take further steps. "I won't stay long if that's what you're worried about." And her voice doesn't sound accusatory at all. It's weak, shaking even. "I really just want to tell you these because it's driving me crazy." 

Siyeon fights the urge to wince. She's freezing as well but she's not so sure if it's because she just got out under the rain for someone, she wants to believe she hates.

"I like you." Bora says. "So much, you have no idea. Heck, I even feel like I love you." She swallows and Siyeon watches her play with the hem of her dampened shirt. "I.." She stutters and Siyeon finds the situation unreal. 

Bora is never nervous around her. It's always the other way around. It's always her that is desperate for her attention (or so she thought). She isn't done processing the first words Bora said and Bora lets out a shaky sigh.

"I know I was stupid for taking you to that party knowing Handong was there." Bora says and Siyeon visibly tenses at the mention of Handong. "But I was so desperate to show her how well I'm doing without her. She has always taken a hold of my life. Like I am not me without her." Bora's voice cracks and she bows down. "I know I should have told you about it. I didn't mean to let what happened happen." 

Siyeon drinks the information and forces it down her throat. She speaks before her mind can even process her words and she see Bora looking back at her, "Do you still love her?" 

Bora shakes her head, the droplets of water from her hair wetting Siyeon's wall and it all looks unreal. "No. Not anymore." And perhaps it's the confidence in Bora's voice and the certainty in her words but Siyeon feels like a weight has been lifted from her back.

"You know I don't want to see you, right?" She asks and Bora shifts. She looks tiny against the door. Siyeon wants to hold her. 

"Yes." Bora answers, her voice sounding so timid. It's as if she has accepted defeat without the result being announced yet. "I understand that."

"But I like you so much I can't even stick to my plan." She says and Bora's eyes widen like she isn't so obvious about it all this time. Bora blinks and Siyeon thinks she's about to cry. "I like you so much that even when I want to hate you, I can't."

"Siyeon…" 

"I know it isn't your fault. You have a dick for an ex and it's not your problem." She adds and Bora chuckles. "But maybe because I like you so much, I can't help but be hurt. She kissed you and I was there to see, and it brings me to all the times you'd come so close to kissing me but you always back away." 

Bora shakes her head. "No. It's not like that. I want to. Believe me." And as though her answer shocks her, Bora shuts up, covering her mouth with her hand.

Siyeon shakes her head, stopping the smile that is threatening to paint her lips. She walks to her bedroom to get Bora and herself a towel and rushes back to get a shirt for Bora to change into. When she comes back, Bora is still standing near the door, blowing on her hands to keep it warm and Siyeon's heart aches.

"You shouldn't have gone here when it's raining so hard." Siyeon says as she drapes the towel around Bora, the shorter girl looking up at her.

"But it's the only chance I have left so you would notice me." Bora answers sadly. Siyeon fixes her hair, moving her fringes sticking onto her forehead as she wipes her face gently with the end of the towel.

Siyeon feels guilty. "I'm sorry." 

"No. Please. Don't apologize." Bora tears up for real this time, her lips quiver as she speaks. "It's my fault, baby." 

Siyeon frowns at the endearment. Not because she dislikes it but because she missed hearing it. She looks down and sighs. Bora cradles her face with her cold hands and Siyeon shivers. _How she missed this sensation?_

Bora smoothens the lines between her eyebrows. Her thumbs brushes on the side of her cheek, just right where her tears have dried. She doesn't even remember crying. 

"Forgive me, please." Bora begs.

Siyeon leans her head on Bora's hand as she looks her straight in the eyes. A few months back, she has asked herself when the perfect timing will be for her to confess to Bora, to finally let her know how she feels. She spoke some truth a while ago, but she finally finds the right time to actually say it. The perfect timing is finally right before her.

"I like you so much." Siyeon says, meaning to say more than that but is taking her time. "I forgive you."

Bora gasps, gaze not leaving Siyeon as the latter kisses her palm. It doesn't seem to bother the both of them that they are still dripping wet. Bora steps forward until her pelvis hits Siyeon, her forehead bumps on Siyeon's nose lightly and Siyeon laughs. 

"If you come this close, you must, at least, kiss me."

Bora throws her head back, laughing. "Have I riled you up enough?" 

Siyeon bites her lip and she shyly nod in Bora's surprise. Bora whistles and wiggles her brows before leaning forward to kiss the side of Siyeon's lips. Siyeon draws a soft sigh and she feels Bora smiling. Bora kisses her cheek, and she tiptoes a bit to kiss the side of her head. 

Siyeon whines, placing one hand on Bora's lower back, refusing to let her step back without getting what she wants. She grips Bora's shirt and water spills from the gaps of her fingers. 

Bora is so nervous that she has to bite her bottom lip to stop it from trembling and her upper lip touches Siyeon's skin briefly, so fast that it seems to have not happened if not with the way Siyeon whimpers in her ear. Bora swallows the lump in her throat. "You seem to be liking this so much already." Siyeon says as a matter of fact and Bora drags her hand from where it holds Siyeon's face to her jaw, tracing the sharp line with her fingers and Siyeon shakes in her hold.

"And If I do?"

Siyeon playfully pushes her and she stumbles back with a laugh. Even with the darkness of the living room, Bora can see how wide Siyeon's pupils are. Siyeon closes her eyes slowly, like she is sleepy and when she opens it again, it meets Bora's in a knowing look.

"Kiss me, please." Siyeon sounds desperate, almost drunk from this trance she calls Bora.

Bora lets a soft moan escapes her mouth as she slowly closes the gap between them. Her legs are close to giving up but Siyeon holds her up, pulling her impossibly closer. 

Bora had kissed other people before. They were nothing sort of majestic. None of them felt like how it should have been as portrayed in movies and books. Just simply skin meeting skin but when her lips finally touch Siyeon's, an overwhelming feeling envelope her being and she sighs once and again. Her lower lip fits perfectly in between Siyeon's pair. 

Siyeon tastes like coffee and smells like raindrops and Bora takes her in. She moves back to gauge Siyeon's reaction. She wants to check if Siyeon is just as high as she is but before she can even confirm it, the latter pushes her until her back hits the door with a loud thud. She groans. Siyeon presses her body on her. One of her hand holds Bora's above her head while the other skirts under the hem of Bora's shirt, grazing her nails on her waist. 

Bora feels delirious but she lets a small laugh come past her lip. "Fuck. You're so hot."

Siyeon looks so good with her hair sticking on her face and neck. Her eyes are somehow droopy, but her pupils are of the size of clover. Her cheeks red and she's panting. Bora can easily break free from her grip, but she decides not to. She allows Siyeon to get what she wants from her.

Siyeon pushers herself on Bora again and Bora curses under her breath from the sensation. She feels dizzy from being under the rain for hours and even dizzier with how Siyeon takes her lips for another kiss. Siyeon kisses her like she's memorizing every part of her, like she's marking her and Bora feels so much pleasure from the thought of being Siyeon's.

Siyeon lets her go, breathless. She heaves and rests her head on Bora's shoulder. The redness on her cheeks crawl up to the tips of her ears and Bora chuckles. She feels her grip on the doorknob tightens (she has no idea that she's been holding the doorknob so tightly for her dear life) and her other hand falls on her side as Siyeon lets go of it. "You went wild."

Siyeon whines and she buries her face deeper on Bora's wet hair. She says something but Bora's hair muffles it. Bora hums, urging her to repeat herself and Siyeon moves away. Her eyes still dark, no trace of hazel at all and she's still breathing hard. She shyly looks away as she says, "I've waited so long to do that." 

Bora's features soften and she hugs Siyeon, the latter almost falling down butt first. Siyeon tries to balance the both of them and she laughs at how Bora jumps to have her legs wrapped around her waist. "Thank you for forgiving me."

Siyeon stills feel guilty about it. She sighs and wraps her arms around Bora's tiny frame. loving how she fits just perfectly. She kisses the side of her head and she puts her down with a grin never leaving her face. She feels euphoric.

Bora properly wipes herself with the towel Siyeon handed her and she tries to be discreet in asking, "Where do we stand now?"

Siyeon looks around innocently. "In my place."

Bora makes a deadpan expression and Siyeon laughs at her. "I don't know." She begins. " What do you want us to be?"

Bora blushes. "I want you stop seeing other people and date me exclusively? Maybe?"

Siyeon smiles. "In short?"

It's always impressive how fast Bora can change from a cocky and bratty chaos of a woman to a blushing and shy mess. She opens her mouth to speak then stops as her face gets even more redder. Siyeon nudges her shoulder, feeling a bit of satisfaction at getting the older girl flustered. 

"Do you want to be my girlfriend? Or something?" Bora makes a face and Siyeon laughs at her before placing a peck on her pouty lips.

"Yes. I want to be your girlfriend. Or something."

Bora stands still for a few seconds until the words sink in. She hops around the space, tipping some of Siyeon's stuff. Siyeon only regards her with a warm smile. There's something growing inside of Siyeon that she perfectly recognizes. Bora jokes about her insides pruning and Siyeon pulls her to the bathroom. They bathe longer than they would have and by the time they finish, Siyeon is covered with marks on her neck, her chest and on her thighs. Bora doesn't look any better. She's even convinced Siyeon broke her legs because she can't feel them.

When they cuddle later that evening (or dawn), Siyeon lets Bora spoon her, insisting that in the relationship, she is the big spoon. Siyeon knows better than to tell her that she basically ends up cuddled in Siyeon's arms once she's deep asleep.

Siyeon lets the words linger at the tip of her tongue and she doesn't have the need to rush. Bora and her would take all the time they need.

_Perfect timing isn't as far as it seems._

**Author's Note:**

> i am @minjiyoo on twitter <3


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